To Whom It May Concern,
Who are you? Are you concerned? Why? I am perfectly aware when things concern me and when they don't. It's really quite simple, really. And what more, how come you never write me back? Whenever I send you a message you never write me, Ms. May Concern. I'll either get a letter from one of your lackeys or from no one at all. This makes me sad, just like all those letters I wrote to Santa Claus growing up. I never did receive that gun I asked him for. Don't be like him Whom It, please, I can't lose another. First the Easter Bunny, then it was the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus, Doc Brown and then Jack Bauer. I'm very concerned about this and I hope that your are too. I know that this may concern you, so if you're concerned please write me back. And please, don't get your dad or brother or husband to do it for you. I don't want to receive another letter from Who it Did Concern. I hope this message finds you well. Give my regards to Sir or Madam. And if you get the chance, let All Interested Parties know I said 'sup. Thanks Whom It.
Regards,
A Concerned Citizen
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