Cheeseburger Haiku - Burger Joint

Hey y'all. What's next on tap at the CB-ku? We've got Burger Joint at some fancy schmanzy hotel in Midtown. According to some internet sources, it's the best burger in NYC. I had to see for myself.

The place it's housed in may be fancy, but the burger joint itself was anything but. Made to look like a crummy hole in the wall, the restaurant had a good feel to it. Whether or not the dingy atmosphere was synthetic or authentic in such a ritzy neighborhood is beside the point. We're here to discuss the burger and the burger only. Which, coincidentally, is what I got, seeing as how it is the only option on the menu.

I ordered the burger with cheese, pickles, onions, lettuce and ketchup. It came fast and it came greasy. It wasn't as big as I would have liked, but the meat seemed to go up rather than out, which can be a problem with a lackadaisical chef, but this burger flipper was master of his grill, as it came cooked to the right amount of medium. This burger, like the place, was not fancy. Not that it tried to be; this was the Vin Diesel of burgers, and I mean that in a good way. It was beefy, simple and went down fast & furious. This was the kind of burger that would wear flannel if burgers wore clothes. It was rugged and burly. But more than that, it's simple-ness was likely it's saving grace. It was nice to have a burger with supermarket fixings. The tasty beef was allowed to shine through. And shine it did; perfectly complemented with my root beer. The fries left something to be desired: another burger. Next time will I have enough gumption to be 2 fast 2 furious. Only time will tell. On to the Haiku.

Music Notes: Black Metal

January 2011 - Black Metal
New feature! Follow me as I sum up a month’s worth of my listenings and discuss the awesomeness that is my ever-expanding musical catalogue. My tastes consist of mostly metal and hard rock. Especially metal and hard rock that can also be sub-classified as progressive. I’ve got tons of classic rock on vinyl and I’ve been known to dabble in some funk here and there. Also, HUGE Warren Zevon fan.

The new year started off unlike any other for me, ever. I have been immersed in a real winter season. Snow! Ice! Slush! More Snow! As a result of the cold weather, my musical leanings have taken me somewhere I once vowed to avoid. That’s right, the realms of black metal.

My knowledge of black metal is abysmal (not to be confused with abyssal, which would be roughly the knowledge of someone totally evil, like Satan, or fat nerdy suburban teen), so I won’t pretend to say much on the subject. But what I thought of black metal previously--church burning, face paint and ridiculous spikes--still definitely applies, though there is more to it than that.



I’ve been listening to Agalloch for years now, they are firmly entrenched as one of my favorite all time bands. Recently, they released a new album, Marrow of the Spirit, that was more metal than what I expected from them. That album made me curious, so I checked out the new Enslaved album. The combination of those two albums has opened my eyes to a world of music that I was previously avoiding, due to my previous prejudices against the scene.

Without further ado, here’s a short list of things I’ve been rocking to this month:

Agalloch - Marrow of the Spirit - My favorite album of 2010!
Enslaved - Axioma Ethica Odini - Solid, proggy, black
Alcest - Ecailes De Lune - Downtempo winter tunes
Wolves in the Throne Room - Two Hunters - Intense
The Ocean - Anthropomorphic - Coupled with their previous effort, Heliocentric, this is the only metal I know of that can be classified as philosophy metal
James LaBrie - Static Impulse - Like Dream Theater, but shorter and catchier
Iron Thrones - The Wretched Sun - Post metal done right
Wintersun - S/T - Essential winter listening

Ensiferum - S/T - See above
Jesu - Conqueror - I really can't get tired of this album. Fantastic.
Mastodon - Blood Mountain - Always
Tiamat - Prey - Extremely catchy goth metal
Animals as Leaders - S/T - Solid instrument progressive rock album

Cheeseburger Haiku - Toast

New format!

The amount of work required for the previous iteration proved to be too much work and I felt like I was avoiding eating as many burgers as I should be. So, from here on I'm gonna keep it simple. Plus, with the new format, it'll be ready to go for my eventual Cheeseburger Haiku A Day Calendar I plan on releasing. Only 350+ more haikus.

First up for v2.0: Toast on Bway and 105th. I got the canadian Burger.

Cheeseburger Haiku

The first haiku of the new year is actually the last haiku of the old one. You see, I would have wroted up this haiku when I ated the burger on December 30, but I got blasted in the eye by a laser blast and blast if I couldn't write the blasted thing until now. The burger was the blackened guacamole from Christopher's Burger in Rockridge, Oakland. Right by my old back yard shanty. Earlier in the day I accidentally ate a salad. I swear it was an accident! I slipped on a grease puddle and a bowl of salad fell down my gullet. Needless to say, I needed to get my burger on. And so I did, and it was a blast.

The Burger:


The Haiku:

Oh Guacamole
you are tasty on burger
Crispy, juicy meat

The Aftermath:

Discussion:

This was a tasty burger. Damn tasty. It hit the spot, that's for gosh darn sure. This was the kind of burger that you just have to woof down, and not because Ramon is outside waiting in the car, but because, like a Loggins and Messina album, it's just smooth. I don't mean to say that the burger was pureed and fed to me through a straw (which sounds like a wonderful idea), but that each of the flavors played so nicely with one another that it created a wonderful blend on which to chomp. Over here on the east coast there is guacamole, but, sadly, it's not the same guacamole I know and love as a 25 year resident of CA. So it had that going for it. Was it the best guacamole ever? Probably not, but it did it's job. As for the blackened: I don't know much about blackened beyond the 'tallica song, but on this burger it did add a nice touch of crispyness to the burger. Add pepper jack cheese to that and a touch of pickle and red onion, and we've got a winner. But...

Were not done. You remember when I told you that this burger joint was in a previous 'hood of mine? Well, good for you. There are two things about Christopher's Burger that I love them for and that I have added to my burger repertoire: chipotle mayo and grilled bun. Until I master the art of making mayo, I'll be adding chipotle spice to regular mayo to recreate this delightful smattering of taste. The decadence of a bun slathered with butter and pan fried before being introduced to Mr. Patty is, in a word, decadent. As in: "It may not take an entire decade off of your life, but it will put a dent in those ten years." Zing!

Later that night, I played laser tag. Laser tag is great. Until next burger time with Josh, take it easy.

Happy new year.