Cheeseburger Haiku

The first haiku of the new year is actually the last haiku of the old one. You see, I would have wroted up this haiku when I ated the burger on December 30, but I got blasted in the eye by a laser blast and blast if I couldn't write the blasted thing until now. The burger was the blackened guacamole from Christopher's Burger in Rockridge, Oakland. Right by my old back yard shanty. Earlier in the day I accidentally ate a salad. I swear it was an accident! I slipped on a grease puddle and a bowl of salad fell down my gullet. Needless to say, I needed to get my burger on. And so I did, and it was a blast.

The Burger:


The Haiku:

Oh Guacamole
you are tasty on burger
Crispy, juicy meat

The Aftermath:

Discussion:

This was a tasty burger. Damn tasty. It hit the spot, that's for gosh darn sure. This was the kind of burger that you just have to woof down, and not because Ramon is outside waiting in the car, but because, like a Loggins and Messina album, it's just smooth. I don't mean to say that the burger was pureed and fed to me through a straw (which sounds like a wonderful idea), but that each of the flavors played so nicely with one another that it created a wonderful blend on which to chomp. Over here on the east coast there is guacamole, but, sadly, it's not the same guacamole I know and love as a 25 year resident of CA. So it had that going for it. Was it the best guacamole ever? Probably not, but it did it's job. As for the blackened: I don't know much about blackened beyond the 'tallica song, but on this burger it did add a nice touch of crispyness to the burger. Add pepper jack cheese to that and a touch of pickle and red onion, and we've got a winner. But...

Were not done. You remember when I told you that this burger joint was in a previous 'hood of mine? Well, good for you. There are two things about Christopher's Burger that I love them for and that I have added to my burger repertoire: chipotle mayo and grilled bun. Until I master the art of making mayo, I'll be adding chipotle spice to regular mayo to recreate this delightful smattering of taste. The decadence of a bun slathered with butter and pan fried before being introduced to Mr. Patty is, in a word, decadent. As in: "It may not take an entire decade off of your life, but it will put a dent in those ten years." Zing!

Later that night, I played laser tag. Laser tag is great. Until next burger time with Josh, take it easy.

Happy new year.